Is the Glass Half-Empty or Half-Full?

Last update December 23, 2019, by Alan Silverstein,

There are plenty of webpages out there with answers to the timeworn question, "is the glass half-empty or half-full?" Well here's another one, with a few humorous replies I've come across myself.

The glass is...

  1. Half-empty. (pessimist)

  2. Half-full. (optimist)

  3. Twice the size it needs to be. (engineer)

  4. Halfway to the next beer!

  5. Depends, what's in it?

  6. Hey, who drank out of my glass?

  7. The missing half must be on the other side of the road. (No, wait, that's a chicken joke.)